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by cafedanslanuit



Category: Mystic Messenger (Video Game)
Genre: A is for angst, Angst, Angst and Feels, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Angst with a Happy Ending, F/M, Mentions of miscarriage, domestic angst, it's not too graphic but it's discussed, so it's best to keep it in mind if it's a sensible topic for u
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-01
Updated: 2020-06-01
Packaged: 2021-03-02 19:20:38
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,318
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24481915
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cafedanslanuit/pseuds/cafedanslanuit
Summary: You are staying at Jaehee’s after Jumin did something that made you really angry. While staying there, you start feeling sick and end up at the hospital. What you first thought was nothing to worry about, quickly turns into a nighmare that could change your relationship.
Relationships: Han Jumin & Main Character, Han Jumin & Reader, Han Jumin/Main Character, Han Jumin/Reader
Comments: 8
Kudos: 101





	Home

**Author's Note:**

> trigger warning, in case you didn't read the tags: mentions of miscarriage.

You weren’t really broken up.

Not really. Your things were still at the penthouse and you really weren’t planning on picking them up, but you were still mad at him. Until you could work those feelings out, the best way to avoid your boyfriend for a while. Thankfully, Jaehee had been kind enough to let you crash on her couch. It wasn’t really uncomfortable, but it smelt funny. You thought it was because of Jaehee’s habit of snacking while watching Zen’s musicals. Maybe there were some crumbles between the pillows, because every time you woke up, you were so disgusted by the smell it made your head twirl.

You loved Jumin. You really did, but you couldn’t help being so angry with him. You wanted you go to the penthouse, talk to him about what happened and fix things up, but you knew you couldn’t do this if you were still as angry and resentful as you were. You needed a couple of days away to melt down your rage and also to teach Jumin the weight of his actions.

That day, you were having breakfast on the kitchen table as you read some news on your Twitter feed. Jaehee had already gone to C&R, asking you if you wanted to send Jumin a message. You knew it wasn’t she didn’t want you there, but she had mentioned Jumin looked restless, more irritated and didn’t have the capacity to focus as much as he did before. You told her, yet again, you didn’t have anything to tell him. She nodded, pursing her lips and went to work.

When you finished eating breakfast, you decided to help a little by cleaning the house. You put on your headphones and started sweeping the living room. Just as you were almost done with it, a known song started playing, making you stop your movements to listen to it. Obviously Je Te Veux by Erik Satie had to come up on your playlist while you were trying your best at being mad with the man who had presented that song to you. 

“Fuck you, Jumin Han” you muttered as you started sweeping more angrily than before.

You knew he hadn’t meant to hurt you, but he had. You knew it was part of his work, but maybe it shouldn’t be anymore. Or maybe… maybe you could adapt to it? You didn’t know what was the right answer. And when you knew it, you would return to Jumin’s apartment, if he’d still have you. A knot formed on your throat. Yeah, he would take you back. You were sure.

Almost sure.

As you were done with sweeping, you started cleaning the bathroom. That was when you first felt wetness between your legs. You checked the date and realized it was your period. Thankfully, Jaehee’s bathroom was equipped with pads, so you had no problem with washing your panties and putting a pad on a fresh pair. You kept doing the cleaning, thankfully not having any cramps yet. Half an hour later, you went to the kitchen, where you started washing all the dishes and putting everything in its place. You went to the bathroom again and realized there was a medium sized blood clot resting on your pad. You furrowed your eyebrows. You hadn’t experienced anything like that before, well, at least not a clot that big. It was probably the size of your thumb. You changed pads again, also noticing you were having a heavier period than usual.

You went back to cleaning, but an hour after that, you went to the bathroom again to find yourself in the same situation. This time, you knew something was wrong. But you didn’t like the idea of going to a hospital. Yes, your period was definitely heavier than usual but that didn’t mean it was worth a hospital visit. You changed pads, trying not to notice the clot was bigger this time.

Half an hour later, your pad was fully damped again. You felt like calling Jaehee, but that would mean Jumin would have to know about her hospital visit and you didn’t feel like seeing him in that moment. Especially not in this vulnerable moment. You changed your pad again and stuffed some more in your purse. As you were leaving Jaehee’s apartment, you took out your phone and sent a voice message to Zen, avoiding using the RFA messenger app.

“Hey, I’m… I’m okay but I’m going to the hospital. I’m a little scared?” you laughed nervously, hopping on the elevator. “Uhm, I’m having… how should I put this?”

You forgot how awkward it was for you to talk about your period with someone else. And a part of you thought maybe Zen wasn’t the right person after all. He was, after all, someone who wanted to present himself like a knight in shining armor, waiting to rescue their princess. And princesses didn’t talk about period or blood clots.

But fuck it.

“I’m bleeding a lot heavier than usual. Like, a lot. And I’m scared, so I’m going to the emergency room. Just… please tell me everything’s fine?” you added in a small voice.

You sent the message and hopped on a cab. A few minutes later, you received a text that simply read: “Which hospital?”

———-

“I hate to say this, but maybe you should have gone to that clinic that is a partner of C&R” Zen muttered, letting out a sigh. “They would have called you earlier”

“I hate you for saying that as well” you replied, shifting on your seat.

It had been an hour and a half and you were still on the waiting room and of course, you were still bleeding. It wasn’t the best hospital in town, but you didn’t want to cause a scene in a hospital or clinic C&R had a relationship with. You didn’t want to take the chance of having someone call Jumin and let him know you were there. But you had already gone through two changes already and you were afraid you were going to stain your clothes. 

No, not really. The reason you were starting to freak out was because you knew what could be a cause of heavy bleeding. You didn’t want to think it was an option, but you knew there was a possibility it was a miscarriage. You swallowed thick, not wanting to entertain that option. You were young, even younger than Jumin, it didn’t make sense you were suddenly having a miscarriage. You weren’t even sure you had been pregnant. You couldn’t be– your period wasn’t even late and you weren’t showing any symptoms of pregnancy, you would have noticed if you–

Suddenly, the memory of waking up to a smelly couch made you tense up. What if it really wasn’t smelly? What if it was some sort of mild morning sickness? And maybe your bleeding was not actually your period, just an horrid coincidence on that day your body had decided to have a miscarriage. You felt your knee going up and down, not being able to do anything about it.

“MC” Zen insisted. “I can’t take this anymore, we need to go to St. Claire’s. I know it’s owned by C&R but there’s a reason the trust-fund kid always goes there, they treat him like royalty. And you’re whiter than when we first got here. I don’t know what’s going on with you but please, at least let a doctor see you. We need to get out of here” he insisted.

“No. They’re gonna call me any moment now”

“Fuck, MC…” Zen sighed, a hand going through his hair. “I don’t know what happened between you and Jumin, but this is your health that’s at stake. So, listen to me”.

Would Jumin take you back now that you were probably having a miscarriage? Would he blame her? Of course it– it wasn’t her fault if that was the case but… how would he take it? Would he close himself, not letting her be a part of the grieving? Would he send her back, not wanting to be reminded of having lost his unborn child every time he looked at her?

You realized you were crying when you felt Zen taking your hand into his. You quickly wiped your face with the back of your hand, trying to hide how scared you actually were.

“Jumin, I’m with MC at the hospital downtown” you turned your head quickly at Zen’s voice and shook your head, trying to make him stop. “We’ve been waiting too long for a doctor, but…” you unsuccessfully tried to take away his phone. “Stop” Zen warned you. He went back to his phone call, “We’re going to St. Claire’s, tell them MC is on the way and she needs a doctor right now”.

Zen made a pause while you hid your face on your hands, hating how the situation had gone out of control. “Yes, send an ambulance. She’s not critical but she’s too weak for me to take her on my motorcycle”. Zen hung up his phone and helped you stand up, leaving the emergency room and heading towards the hospital entrance.

“Why would you do that?” you complained, taking your arm away from Zen, but still walking alongside him. “I told you I didn’t want him involved in this!”

“Look, babe, sorry but I wished you could look at yourself. You’re really pale, you’re losing more and more blood and while I hate that Jumin practically bought a clinic just so he didn’t have to wait, I don’t care if it means you’re getting that treatment too”.

You sighed and nodded, defeated. You were surprised you hadn’t felt dizzy or felt any sort of pain since all this nightmare had started. You just felt anxious about the possible miscarriage you could be having. 

Ten minutes later, an ambulance from St. Claire’s clinic arrived at the front of the hospital. You reluctantly entered the ambulance, the paramedics asking you thousand of questions and already connecting you to some machines to see how you were doing. Zen told you he was going to follow the ambulance with his motorcycle, only obtaining a nod as an answer from you.

You explained your situation to the paramedics, who asked you to lay down so you could rest until you arrived to the clinic. There was a woman who had the softest voice and assured you you were doing just fine, but they could see what was exactly the problem once you arrived to the clinic. She kept trying to engage in conversation with you, trying to ease your mind about everything.

“Is it… a miscarriage?” you asked in a soft voice. The woman pursed her lips and you felt yourself breaking a little.

“We don’t know yet. We’ll know once we get there, don’t worry” she said.

She kept talking, trying to ease you but you couldn’t listen anything further than they didn’t know if you was losing your child or not. You didn’t care about anything else.

Before you thought, the ambulance came to a stop and when they opened the doors, you recognized the two tall men standing in front on the ambulance, one with black hair the the other one with silver hair.

You escaped from Jumin’s gaze, but perfectly heard him questioning the paramedics what was wrong with you. You didn’t understand a lot of what they were saying, but you did get to hear “gynecorrhagia”. What a wonderful way to put a name to something just so they didn’t have to say they didn’t know what caused it.

The paramedics helped you sit on a wheelchair and you were rushed into the clinic. Not even a minute later, you were in front of the gynecologist office. You heard the nurse explain to Zen and Jumin that he was the head of the Gynecology Department, and that they were prepping the room for you. You heard your boyfriend make further questions but even though his tone was firm and stern, you could tell how his voice wavered just a bit on the end of his sentences. He was scared. Maybe because he also knew what it could mean?

“The doctor’s ready for you” you head the nurse say to you, making you snap your head to her direction, startled. You nodded and you felt her wheeling you to the office. You looked around, seeing you were in a small hall rather than an office. You were helped out of your chair and once again, you felt yourself completely wet with blood. The nurse guided you to a small bathroom and gave you a hospital robe, instructing you to change into it.

Once in the bathroom, you took the chance of cleaning yourself up before changing into the robe. You looked at yourself in the mirror and realized Zen was right: you were in fact very pale. You washed your hands thoroughly and got out of the bathroom, where the nurse was waiting for you.

“I’m scared of staining these” you confessed, following the nurse to another door, presumably the actual doctor’s office.

“Don’t be, please. You’re going through a hard time, don’t think about that. Besides, those are disposable” she explained with a soft smile. You smiled back. “Do you wish anyone to accompany you inside the office?” she asked, before opening the door.

In that situation, honestly you couldn’t think why it was even an option. There was only one person you wanted by your side in that moment.

When you entered the office, the doctor smiled warmly at you and showed you to the examination gurney. She started asking you questions about everything, her soothing voice calming your nerves. You heard a knock on the door and then the nurse’s voice announcing Jumin was there. Thanking the gurney was not in front of the door and you were covered from shoulders to knees, you turned your head towards the door, looking at an awkward Jumin standing there, waiting for an indication.

“Hey” you muttered softly. Jumin looked at you, and for the first time, you could see how scared he was. He was doing his best at trying to hide it, but the way his legs were shifting his weight and how he was incessantly twisting his own fingers gave him away. “Come here” you said, holding out a hand for him. He walked to you, standing on your side while the doctor turned on one of her machines and put on a pair of gloves. Jumin took your hand and you squeezed it, trying to calm both of you.

The doctor warned you, but you still felt some discomfort when you felt the head of the ultrasound scanner entering you. You saw some incomprehensible black and white figures on the screen, wondering if you were supposed to see something.

“Well, I don’t see anything” she commented, making you heart sink.

“I lost it?” you quickly asked, your voice breaking down. Your hold on Jumin’s hand tightened and so did his, but you couldn’t bear to look at him in the eye yet.

“Lost? No, don’t worry. You didn’t have a miscarriage. The blood they took from you on the ambulance shows you weren’t pregnant at all” she explained. You felt your soul return to your body and pulled Jumin’s hand in front of your mouth, pressing light kisses to the back of his hand, whispering soft nothings, almost like a thankful prayer.

“So why did she…?” Jumin asked, his voice more neutral now.

“It was probably an hormonal imbalance” the doctor said, removing carefully the scanner. “Right now I’m going to ask for some IV for her so the bleeding stops. Then we’re going to do an exam on her hormonal levels so we can recommend some medicine in case she needs it”.

“Just like that? She’s… okay? She’s been bleeding all morning” Jumin interfered. You knew he did it out of worry, like a part of him wanted to be entirely sure you were healthy.

“The woman’s body is full or mysteries, Mr. Han” the doctor commented. “I’ve seen this before. In most women’s, is a once in a lifetime scenario, and they never present that problem again. Some may not even need medicine on the long run, but I’m still going to order every exam I can think of so we make sure she’s completely fine” she assured him.

You turned around and looked at Jumin, who still didn’t look convinced.

“Jumin” you said, his eyes looking right into yours. “I’m okay. You can rest now”. He pressed a kiss on the top of your forehead while you kissed his hand again. You felt incredibly happy to have him by your side, knowing you hadn’t lost anything and neither of you were going through that kind of pain.

The doctor excused herself, leaving the room as she gave the nurse some instructions you thought were about the IV she had mentioned.

“When the IV’s done… I want to come back to the penthouse” you said softly, looking at Jumin’s hand. You felt him chuckle and softly moved your chin so you could look at him. God, why did he have to look so handsome?

“Yes, of course. We’ll return home after this”

You felt your cheeks heating up at the thought of the penthouse being ‘home’ for both of you.

“But…” you started. You smile on Jumin’s face wavered a little, but he still let you continue. “I still don’t like when those women flirt at you. I know it’s part of your job and I know it’s not like you flirt with them, but it still hurt when I saw that woman with her hand up and down your arm, trying to obtain something”

“I used to do that. A lot, I… I always let women invested in the corporate world to flirt with me when there was something for C&R to gain. I would, at best, use some gentleman mannerisms to keep that going. But I don’t think that’s something I want to keep doing” Jumin stated. He brought closer both of your hands and kissed the back of your hand, making you smile. “I’ve already told you I want to marry you. I agreed to your request about waiting at least a year before I officially ask you, but I can’t see how I would change my mind. With each day that goes by, I am only reassured with my desire to make you my wife. But I didn’t take your feelings into consideration with the way I used to run deals. I like to believe I’ve made my work known in C&R enough to stop using antique ways to make deals go through instead of trusting my negotiating abilities. MC, I can promise I won’t do that again”.

“Thank you” you smiled. “Now, please kiss me”

Jumin didn’t wait long before bending down and kissing you softly on the lips. Not being able to kiss that man for almost two weeks was definitely torture, not something you’d ever want to be without again. You were five months into the year you had asked Jumin to wait, but if he kept being such an extraordinary man like this, you were seriously thinking about cutting that time in half.

Once he stood up again, you noticed a playful smile on his lips.

“Now that you mention it, you called Zen before calling me?” he asked, arching one eyebrow.

“Hey, want me to go back to Jaehee’s?” you threatened playfully, making him chuckle.

The nurse returned to the room and helped you stand up, giving you a fresh robe for you to change.

“How are you feeling?” she asked.

“Better” you admitted. You looked back at Jumin and smiled. “But right now I just want to go home”.

**Author's Note:**

> i wanted to take a momment and mention this can happen to women sometimes. it's a hormonal imbalance and it's scary as shit but sometimes it can be nothing to worry about. it's still very important to go to a doctor, let them take tests and confirm this! please go to a doctor whenever something changes in your menstrual cycle.  
> hope you liked this story <3


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